Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

Term 4 is crunch time, with the stress of end-of-year (or final!) exams, report cards, deadlines, and more, leaving students feeling under pressure! Today's conversation includes our top tips to help parents reduce exam stress and guide kids to exam success. In this episode: Hope The marshmallow test Self-control Resilience and wellbeing The role of failure Taking the pressure off Strategies and tips for parents The 3 Es of Effective Discipline: Explore, Explain, and Empower Finding balance Time management Teaching mindfulness and self-care Related links:  #140 Life After Year 12 How do I get my Daughter to Drop Social Media and Study for Exams? #334 Rock Solid Study with Katie Jnes 3 A+ Tips for Getting your Kids (and yourself) Through Exams Find us on Facebook or TikTok Subscribe to the Happy Families newsletter Leave a voice memo here or email your questions/comments to podcasts@happyfamilies.com.au Become a Happy Families Member todaySee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Is it okay to go away with your friends and leave your partner at home managing everything and everyone? How do you make it work, and should you even try?  A successful trip without your partner hinges on a strong, trusting relationship. Open communication, mutual respect, and a willingness to support one another are crucial. With the right approach, solo trips can enrich both your individual experiences and your relationship, creating a healthy balance for both partners. In this episode, we dive into the key considerations you need to be mindful of when planning time away without your significant other. From potential challenges to the points of friction that can arise, we explore how to navigate these moments with care. In this episode: Affordability, logistics What's your intention behind the trip? Supportive partners Differences between girl and boy getaways Emotional intensity - deep conversations, bonding Choosing companions who elevate you Strategic incompetence Resentment and communication challenges

Are we doing more harm than good by pushing our children to excel early? The pursuit of excellence can feel rewarding for parents and children alike, but scientific evidence highlights the conflict between short-term gains and long-term success.  Today, we say a sad farewell to Craig Bruce as he concludes his remarkable tenure as Executive Producer of this podcast, and a heartfelt thank you from the entire Happy Families team for the extraordinary contributions Craig has made to Happy Families!  (R) This episode originally aired 15/7/24. In this episode: Pushing kids to succeed Acceleration programs for young children Effects of Early Talent Promotion on Junior and Senior Performance: A Systematic Review and Meta-Analysis  Harmonious passion VS Obsessive passion Intrinsic motivation Gifted and talented children Happiness and wellbeing levels  Finding healthy balance and having varied experiences No wasted knowledge in life Related links:  How Much Sport is Too Much for our Kids? Going to High-Achieving Sch

Dr Justin’s 3 E’s (explore, explain, and empower) are the pillars of autonomy-supportive parenting. But there are times when they just do not work (we are all only flawed humans after all!). Today's tips will help you calmly and confidently navigate through the heat of these challenging moments. (R) This episode originally aired 3/6/24. In this episode: The 3 Es of Effective Discipline: Explore, Explain, and Empower Self-determination theory Basic psychological needs of every human Relatedness, competence, autonomy Need-supportive parenting High emotions = low intelligence Being ok with our children's discomfort Patience and practice Fast is slow, and slow is fast Neurodiversity Turn towards your child in challenging times Related links: The Parenting Revolution, by Dr Justin Coulson The Secret to Regulating Emotions How to Fix a Problem Child Little People, Big Feelings [The Free Webinar] Find us on Facebook or TikTok Subscribe to the Happy Families newsletter Leave a voice memo here or email your questi

Justin shares four big ideas based on Jonathan Haidt's new book in the hope that it generates some constructive conversations with your kids at home: The key to building a resilient child, Getting comfy with our children experiencing a healthy level of discomfort in life, The impact of social media on the brain development of teens, and Looking at problematic use of or addiction to social media. (R) This episode originally aired 01/5/24. In this episode: Healthy/unhealthy childhood stressors Supportive parenting vs "tough love" or over-protective parenting Resilience Anxiety The cycle of incompetence Anti-fragility Impact of social media on teenage brain development Social media addiction / problematic use Links: After Babel | Jon Haidt | Substack The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood Is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness by Jonathan Haidt Honestly with Bari Weiss: Smartphones Rewired Childhood. Here's How to Fix It Find us on Facebook or TikTok Leave a voice memo here or email

Are you wanting to return to work but struggling to know what on Earth to write on your resume after years out of the workforce? Listen in for some ideas that will inspire and encourage mothers to confidently claim the skills, strengths, and unique value you possess and can offer the world!  (R) This episode originally aired 29/4/24. In this episode: Cost-of-living increase Returning to work Motherhood Being a mum is valid and valuable work, so I put it on my CV - ABC Everyday Writing a resume Parental responsibilities, skills, unique value Stay-at-home-mums (SAHM) Kylie's resume – Happy Families Find us on Facebook or TikTok Leave a voice memo here or email your questions/comments to podcasts@happyfamilies.com.au Find out more about joining THE QUEST at our websiteSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

If you are struggling to "keep the spark alive" with your loved one, you're not alone. Exhaustion, screen addiction, lack of time, resentment - all these issues (and more!) can lead to zero interest in nurturing intimacy. Today we share some surprising secrets to sustaining a strong sexual connection! (R) This episode originally aired 2/05/24. In this episode: Reasons for having zero interest in intimacy  Connection and friendship Prioritising sex Slowing things down Female pleasure Book recommendations  Links: Nurturing Intimacy: Secrets to Sustaining Strong Sexual Connection – Happy Families Come as You Are by Emily Nagoski | The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life She Comes First by Ian Kerner | The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring a Woman Find us on Facebook or TikTok Leave a voice memo here or email your questions/comments to podcasts@happyfamilies.com.au Find out more about joining THE QUEST at our websiteSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Is it just me...or are sleepovers a really bad idea? (R) This episode originally aired 28/3/24. In this episode: Pros and cons of sleepovers Social development Memories Safety concerns Peer pressure/exclusion Screens Prearming your kids #926 Who Tops the List of Child Sexual Abusers? – Happy Families Being on the Outer – Happy Families Are Sleepovers OK? – Happy Families Find us on Facebook or TikTok Email your questions and comments to podcasts@happyfamilies.com.au Find out more about joining THE QUEST at our websiteSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The meltdown out of nowhere, an angry and aggressive child, the emotionally flooded teen - kids of all ages have BIG emotions, and experience emotional dysregulation! Discover the tools and skills that will help you respond to your child with compassion and kindness - and build emotional awareness and regulation for you both. (R) This episode originally aired 17/10/23. Topics in this episode: No Matter What Emotion regulation  The magic of Nature Moving forward, finding solutions Responding with compassion and gentleness Emotion Coaching- a Happy Families article  Little People, Big Feelings - a Happy Families webinar  The Secret to Regulating Emotions - a Happy Families article Find us on Facebook at Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families Email us your questions and comments at podcasts@happyfamilies.com.auSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Marriage is not just about the "happily ever after", but rather the real-world benefits of a life of meaning, joy, purpose, and growth. Keep your relationship strong by avoiding 5 things that harm marriage the most. [R] This episode originally aired on 7/3/24. In this episode: Damaging mindsets Commitment, trust, connection Intention vs action Divorce contagion Provocative statistics Get Married by Brad Wilcox Positive outcomes for children Household work, mental load Find us on Facebook or TikTok Email your questions and comments to podcasts@happyfamilies.com.au Learn more about joining THE QUESTSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

*Content warning: parental discretion advised* Australia's e-Safety Commissioner Julie Inman Grant describes the fast-paced and aggressive tactics used by sexual extortionists targeting children and young adults. She gives clear directives to parents on how to prevent online harm, and what to do if your child experiences sexual extortion.  [R] This episode originally aired on 27/2/24. In this episode:  Online sexual extortionists targeting kids Screen rules, limits, safety measures, and supervision Honey trap tactics  Fast-paced escalation from charm to harm What to do if this happens to your child Keeping your child safe online How to report abuse or content to eSafety | eSafety Commissioner Parents | eSafety Commissioner Sextortion | ACCCE The Teenage Brain – Happy Families Screens in Bedrooms? – Happy Families Find us on Facebook or TikTok Email your questions and comments to podcasts@happyfamilies.com.au Learn more about joining THE QUESTSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

*Content warning: parental discretion advised* In a brave and vulnerable conversation, Jake and his mother Hayley talk about their 'honey trap' experience when Jake was 15, sharing just how quickly and easily this can happen to a child or adolescent.  (R) This episode originally aired 26/2/24. In this episode:  Honey traps and online safety Real-life experience of a 15-year-old boy Advice from Hayley and Jake "No Matter What" Related links: Capping: How the Bad Guys Get to Your Kids Online #837 Must-Know Online Safety With Madonna King Find us on Facebook or TikTok Subscribe to the Happy Families newsletter Leave a voice memo here or email your questions/comments to podcasts@happyfamilies.com.au Find out more about joining THE QUEST at our website  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

When your child wants to quit an activity, especially one they’re good at, it can be challenging to know the right thing to do! Should you encourage them to push through, knowing the long-term benefits, or let them move on to something new?  And then there's self-care—how do we even fit it into our hectic, overwhelming lives? It's so easy to let it fall by the wayside, especially for busy parents. But self-care can be more achievable than you think, with little things we can do on a daily basis that provide a moment to breathe and rejuvenate—without breaking the bank or needing more hours in the day. In this episode: When an adult child moves back home - how does it work? Change brings anxiety Resilience [Webinar] The Secret to Regulating Emotions (train analogy) What should you do when a child wants to quit an activity? Overwhelm and burn-out Pippin Girl | Happy, healthy, confident girls Self-care Related links: Self Care Strategies That Really Work Overwhelm: Self-care Strategies for When Eve

A lot of families love to "roast" or tease one another as a means of good-natured camaraderie. When done well (in the right circumstances, the right tone, and for the right reasons), this kind of humour can increase connection. However, when done wrong, it can be disastrous, particularly when children are involved, as they may not understand nuance and sarcasm and tend to internalise this style of humour. Justin and Kylie discuss the role of humour within families, the importance of empathy, and an alternative to roasting and sarcasm that can lead to happier, healthier family relationships. In this episode: ChatGPT “roast my Insta feed” Humour - the good, the bad, the ugly The roast of Tom Brady Sarcasm, trash-talking, 'burning', baiting Verbal sparring, quick thinking, witty banter 3 benefits of "roasting" within a family Building resilience, connection, confidence 3 challenges and concerns of using this humour  Building a culture of disrespect The art of laughing at your own mistakes Empathy Related

Would you let your 9-year-old ride the NY subway alone or your 15-year-old son travel abroad with friends? For doing just that, one mother received the label of "world's worst mum," and another was reported to social services! In today's risk-averse society, our children lack adventure. We want resilient children, and yet we try to control them in the name of safety, preventing them from being too adventurous. The problem is that if our kids don't do hard things, they don't get to be resilient.  Justin and Kylie share why playing it safe may just be the biggest risk of all! Kirstie Allsopp reported to social services for allowing son,15, to travel abroad | The Guardian Free range kids What if...? Resilience malaise I let my 9-year-old ride the subway alone. I got labeled the 'world's worst mum' | Lenore Skenazy | Washington Post Developmentally appropriate independence Finding purpose and direction through adventure and risk-taking The Least Interesting Generation | Brett McKay | The Art of Manliness Res

An anonymous listener shares their frustration and exhaustion with a husband who feels more like an additional child than a partner, offering little support with household and family responsibilities. Justin unpacks "weaponised incompetence" and the unfairness and resentment that build when one parent is left carrying the load and provides guidance on how to address the issue in a way that avoids blame, accusations, and an all-out conflict. Michelle, from Victoria, has a daughter experiencing mental illness, with chronic insomnia, anxiety, and friendship issues—all leading to a feeling of exhaustion and desperation in the home. Justin shares some ideas with Michelle that will help her struggling daughter, emphasising the importance of finding what ignites delight in your child—and giving them more of it! In this episode: Weaponised incompetence When one parent feels overwhelmed, exhausted, resentful Be honest (without accusations or blame) Setting clear expectations and solutions NDIS Couples meeting Getting

In Australia, children below a certain age will be banned from social media as part of a national plan to counter its negative effects on youth. We discuss the government's commitments, the challenges this new legislation may face, and what parents can do now to protect their kids in a screen-saturated world. In this episode: 'National Social Media Age Limit' | A Current Affair Why 13+ is the current legal age Collecting personal data Politics and obstacles facing this legislation The impact of social media on kids Using screens well: with intentionality, self-regulation, limits Play-based childhood VS screen-based childhood Holding tech companies accountable What parents can do while waiting for legislation to pass Kids need smart parents not smartphones Building community Unplug Childhood - sign the pledge & join the village today!  The Screen Smart Series: 'Unplug Childhood' & 'Tweens, Teens & Screens' (included in membership) . Related links:  #980 The Anxious Generation With Jonathan Haidt

Justin shares his disappointment in unwittingly missing out on the opportunity to share meaningful, heartfelt words with the people he loves after choosing to clean the kitchen during an extended family get-together rather than participating in a family activity.  We all have a need to belong. You can help your child to have a sense of who they are and how they belong by creating family traditions and sharing family stories with them. Kylie shares how she included son-in-law Jared in one of their traditions by writing him into their family 'birth" story. In this episode: Missed opportunity Getting priorities right "If tomorrow never comes..." Ronan Keating Why vulnerability is hard! Using technology to check in with people we love Coulson daughter #2 has returned from Europe The need to belong Family traditions and stories Adoption Knowing family roots- -> increased resilience Teaching kids about positive relationships . Related links:  How well do you score in Prof. Duke's 'Do You Know' scale? Family T

A recent study has shown that parents who use humour have better relationships with their kids. But does all humour work in the same way? Are Dad jokes ok? Can sarcasm or roasting your child play a a positive role in parenting? And what are the consequences for our children when humour goes wrong?  In a large-scale Denmark study, data from 1.1 million people has shown associations between moving house in childhood and increased risk of depression later in life. We look at ways that parents can support their child during big transitions and soften the impact of the uprooting experience of moving house. In this episode: Humour in parenting: Does it have a role? | PLOS One Defining humour The consequences when humour goes wrong Funny = reciprocal/consensual The effects of house moves during early childhood on child mental health at age 9 years | Springer Link Bluey 'The Sign' Resilience Parental guilt regarding moving Association versus causation Smoothing transitions for your child Related links: #732 This i

Have you ever wondered if becoming a foster carer is something you could do? Our guest today, Belinda Baxter, has 13 children (6 biological, 7 foster) and joins us for an important conversation about foster care: what it looks like for her family, the challenges and the rewards, and what you can do to get the process started. This week, communities across Australia come together to celebrate Foster Care Week, an annual event dedicated to recognising the invaluable contributions of foster and kinship carers. In this episode: Foster Care Week Types of foster care (full-time, kinship, respite, emergency) Family dynamics Boundaries and foundations Independent living skills The process of becoming a carer Challenges and difficulties of caring for other people's children Related links: Fostering Connections (Victoria) DCJ Foster, relative and kinship care (NSW) Queensland Foster and Kinship Care Become a foster carer (SA) Become a foster carer (WA) Foster and Kinship Carers Association (NT) Foster care - Departm